A Ministry Marriage

Just like when a man and woman fall in love and marry so do pastors and churches. It is a beautiful thing when God weds the heart of a shepherd with a flock and the flock to the shepherd. That blessed union defies description. There is love, commitment, sacrifice, memories, joy, trials, mountains to move and perseverance.

I love to read biographies. I have read hundreds of them over the years. I love reading stories about those pastors who stayed with their flocks for decades. Some twenty, thirty, forty and even fifty years. Unfortunately that has never been my story. The longest we have served any flock has been six years.

 My pastor, Charles Roberts, pastored my home church for 34 years. I asked him once how he did it. He had opportunities to leave to go to other churches. He said he loved the flock and he plodded ahead day after day, month after month and year after year. I have another friend named Jess Little, he is 73, and has shepherded his flock for 23 years. He has faithfully led them, sacrificed for them, served them, and fed them God's word. I recently preached in that church. The love between that pastor and the people were plainly evident.

I have also seen the other side of this coin. When the pastor does not care for the flock and the people do not love the pastor. Bitterness, enmity, strife and often a fractured relationship follow. Sadly many pastors are fired every year. Some deservedly so. Many not so. Some pastors and their families go into ministries blindly and blissfully. They are rudely awakened by disgruntled deacons and callused charter members. Such pastors and their families are bruised and wounded.

There are also dictatorial pastors who abuse churches. They manipulate and steam roll over the people to get their way. They use those people as a stepping stone to go onto to something bigger and better where the pattern repeats itself leaving hurt people in their wake.

I have known the horror of times when it did not work. The ministry marriage never happened. People were hurt. I have also known the other side. There have been beautiful ministry marriages. Brenda and I have known the love of people. We have known the joy of celebrating life's triumphs with people and also grieved with people during their nights of weeping. This is something we pray we will get to experience again.

Pastor's love your flocks. Flocks love your pastors. Trust God for ministry marriages.