A Lonely Trail

 Sometimes we must travel a lonely trail. Our minds and bodies age and our muscles atrophy as we get closer and closer to home. On the trail to home, we lose people we love from time to time. I lost my Papaw, Mamaw, Mama, and a sister along the way. A little over a year ago I lost a close college friend. For those left behind to traverse the trail, it can be a lonely walk. 

Nobody to share conversation. Nobody to eat our meals in fellowship. Nobody to laugh with or no shoulder to cry on when things get tough. There is nobody to understand the loneliness. Our feet may walk onward bravely, but our hearts and minds are not as brave as our feet as we continue marching dutifully down the trail of life. 

If we walk this trail long enough, we find that everyone we loved and were closely associated with leave. Some are snatched away by death. One day they are walking with you and the next day they are gone. I am not saying there are not cases when poor health makes it easier to see the day of death is coming. That does not take away the painful reality that you are left to walk alone. Even our own children grow up and leave the next. Our four sons are scattered. We do not see them often these days. I talked to two of them today, but they are not walking this trail with their mother and me. They have their own trails to blaze. 

I know people who have to walk this lonely trail without their spouse. Some are forced to do so for decades. They live with gaping wounds in their hearts that never really completely heal. What they wouldn't do for a little conversation, one more hug, to hold a hand, or just to see them alive again. Those longings do not materialize so the grieving must trudge the lonely trail alone. Pictures bring back painful memories of happier times. 

I am not suggesting there are not some bright spots on the lonely trail. A good time with family and friends at special gatherings can bring a smile. Sadly, these are few and far between. Monotonous days roll on like the tides and ebb into darkness of night. The nights are hardest. It seems they last longer than their allotted time before the sun sneaks a peak over the horizon. The rhythm of days and nights hypnotize you as you mindlessly move along a little further down the lonely trail. Silence becomes your unwelcomed constant companion. Boredom makes the days seem longer without any hint or hope of excitement on the horizon. It is a lonely trail. 

Even the people of God walk this lonely trail. God is our companion, but sometimes we yearn for Jesus with skin on. Somebody to come along side and share the journey. Somebody who cares to walk with us a few miles. The television is a poor substitute for real true to life companions. Sometimes solitude is a good thing. I fear too much of it though is not healthy. Most people desire to be known, loved, and checked on from time to time. Not to sit secluded in silence stewing in their own thoughts. Those solitary thoughts can lead into some dark dungeons of despair. 

Those who walk the lonely trail feel forgotten. The doorbell never rings. The phone only rings rarely. Books can whisk the mind away for short spells, but in the end they are lifeless. We may recall that God promises to never leave or forsake us. That does not mean we do not get lonely from time to time. 

One day the lonely trail will lead us Christians home. We will never be lonely again in eternity. In the presence of Jesus and before the Father we will find forever fellowship. We will reunite with those who got home before we did. I am counting on Heaven being a noisy place. Lots of singing. Great conversations with the saints from days gone by. We will never be lonely again when we finally get home. What a celebration that will be.