Blue Days

 This is a blue season in the Edwards household. Tucker went back  to college this past Sunday. It is sad. Brenda and I stood at the door after hugging and watched him drive away. We really enjoyed our time together this summer. There have been many memories made. Much laughter. There have been some God moments in all of our sons this summer. Very powerful profound encounters with God for each of them. 

We love our sons. We made them a priority from the moment they were born. Except for working, I gave them my time. I took each of them with me on preaching trips. I enjoyed one on one time with them. Brenda nurtured them and did all the extra things to make birthdays special when we were financially destitute. I stand amazed at her creativity over the years to make special memories. Even to this day she still makes them game day treats. She is a wonderful mother. 

They are all grown now. Tanner does not hardly get to come home anymore because of work. We saw him in May. Before that it was Christmas. Turner is headed off to college in 7 days. Our home will never be the same. Quieter. Emptier. That is part of the parenting journey. 

It is hard to watch God work in their lives under our guidance and then to send them out in the world where we cannot protect them. Temptations abound. God is more capable of protecting them than we ever could be. They have been dedicated to Him all the days of their lives by their mom and dad.

Brenda and I have not been perfect parents. I lost my temper many times. We were strict. We also taught and required a strong work ethic. We did not always do family devotions. Many times we just did not have the money to keep up with all the things their friends got. We have loved them. 

We have loved unconditionally. We have both extended grace and let our sons face the harsh consequences of bad decisions. We have also witnessed them have profound God encounters that transformed their lives. This excites us. Their were times when they seemed apathetic to spiritual things. We loved them them  through it all. 

Turner is now only one week away from leaving the nest also. Our baby boy is grown up. Going off to pursue God's call on his life. These are blue days indeed. 

This is why God gave us four sons. To love. Train in righteousness. To release into the hands of God to fulfill His calling on their lives. This has always been part of the plan. They were meant to leave home. That does not mean it is not sad. 

I recall something my youth minister told me right before I left for football camp at Howard Payne University my freshman year. He told me from that point on, every time I returned home I would do so with a suitcase in my hand. He said it would never be the same. He was right. I only returned home one summer after that freshman year. From then on I only came home for short visits. 

My boys are no longer boys. They are men. I cherish the time Brenda and I had with them. So many memories. So much laughter. The long awaited dreaded day of the empty nest is upon us. Others have endured this season. So will Brenda and I. There will be some blue days to follow. God will faithfully comfort and be near to us in those days. Ps 34:18 is our hope and comfort during these blue days.